Yella’ bellied

As seems to be standard with my blog entries, I’ll start with an apology for not updating more regularly. The honest truth is that I’ve just been busy and havent had the chance! So without further ado…..

I’ll get this out of the way since i havent posted since I it was released – The Dark Knight. It was awesome. You know it was awesome, I know it was awesome, everyone knows. I cant say anything that hasnt been said already. Bravo. And please, encore.

I digress.

Head first. Thats the point I was getting to ironically. It seems to me nowadays thats its the only way to go. It may be my steady diet of superheroic fiction, reckless anime heroes, heroines and villains, but I cant shake the feeling that the only way to go forward isnt with my best foot, its with everything. At some point, I just got sick of sitting around and planning. “I’ll do it in two months and eight days, when event X happens”. of course, event X is postponed a little, and by the time it comes around its pretty much event Y now. Why bother? An old proverb says not to put off till tomorrow that which you can do today, and I finally got around to figuring out how right that is.

There’s something beautiful about seeing someone live every day without fear. Someone who can do and feel everything they want because they know that come what may, everything will work out for the best. it doesnt always of course, but at the time it sure feels like it will. You cross the bridge of negativity when you come to it, never before. I know people who have lived in other countries where they barely speak the language. People who have thrown themselves across the world and al the way back again. People who have made it on their own steam as far as they wanted to go,and are still looking farther. God help me I’m jealous. Gut twistingly, tear inducingly jealous.

I cant say whats in their heads. If they were scared, if they were calm. All I know is that scared or not, by the time push came to shove, they were without fear. Sure it may have hung around them, like a bad smell in the air, but it didnt stick. I hate how scared I get when I think of doing something big. The feeling I get when I do it though…there’s nothing quite like being your own personal hero for ten minutes. Even if that ten miniutes only comes along once every ten years or something.

I mention all this because I have a few ideas. Some that could stay ideas, and some that could mushroom into something bigger. Unfortunatley for me, I’m not fearless. But i think I can be brave.